Monday, June 26, 2006

'cause life.... sucks

So I've decided boys are stupid. Its not me, its not their fault, they're just plain stupid. There!! I've said it...I feel liberated.. OK...not all of them, it's just I've come across some pretty stupid ones lately so I needed to get that out of my chest.

I'll write a little poem
It's for you all who think have touched me
I'll tell you all what I should have said
a long time ago when my heart wasn't dead

For you, my all time friend I say,
For you my dirty little secret I confess,
Finally for you, my so-called soulmate I regret

I can play, I can make you believe
It's been fun I most admitt
But I'm getting tired of the game
Its just always the same

I dont believe what you say
Give your easy words to somebody else
Give your fake bright eyes to someone who cares
Make someone else belive you'll be there
when we both know you'll be elsewhere

I let you touch my little fragile soul
You broke it and never knew
You made me tremble inside
You made my heart feel warm
You tip-toed your way in
and helped me back to sleep
you made me feel I could belive
that life is something meant to be
Too bad it was just all a dream

Friday, June 23, 2006

just a thought...

Nunca escribo como si esto fuera un diario. Creo que hoy es el día. No se que me pasa, siento que mi vida se me escapa. Me siento fuera de mí. Siento que el cuerpo que habito no es el mío, siento que estoy literalmente fuera de mi cuerpo. Me veo hablar, actuar, llorar y siento que no soy yo quien sufre, quien articula y quien ejecuta. Empiezo a sentir un vacio enorme que no se como llenar, creo que nunca lo he hecho. Ignoro el hueco deseando que desaparezca. Sin embargo, se hace más grande. Cada día que pasa me siento más débil, menos capaz. No quiero salir, no quiero pensar, no quiero estar. Despierto sin desear despertar, por inercia. Quiero seguir dormida, quiero dejar de sentir, quiero dejar de estar, quiero desaparecer.
I think she finally broke me, completely.
I woke up and left
suddenly I wasnt there
finally I was free
I was flying with my own wings

Make me forget
all the things she said
please make me feel
my wounds will heal

The thread broke
I finally fell
she made it so tight
I didnt even had to fight

I'm finally free
I can actually breathe
I'm free today
too bad I can't live