Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Late night. No one is around. I find myself looking for someone to help me out of this mess. I'm drunk, uncoordinated and stupid. I'm hurt. I've cried all week over someone who broke my heart. I've been hoping to curse his sorry ass forever. I've casted all kinds of evil spells over him. He will never be loved, we will die alone, he will regret leaving me. Of course, he will eventually marry some dumb blond, have a bunch of kids and live a stupid perfect life. That's the thing with this kind of people, they always get their way.

In a sick kind of way, I get my own too. I mean, I've never pictured myself loving commonly. I've never wanted conventional love. I want crazy, swep-me-off-my-feet, can't-breathe- kind of love. I'm a strong believer that there's no stronger bond than obsession. I want to feel my body tremble every time that someone brushes against me, even if it's by chance.

I got it. Oh boy did I get my twisted, sick, can't-think-straight kind of love. I thought I loved this dumb blond loving idiot. Turns out I didn't. I was drunk as hell. This new idiot came closer. This new idiot had me at hello. He was the kind of guy that doesn't speak much. He just introduced himself and said nice to meet you. It was more than enough. I recognized the crazy look. He was all I've been looking for.

Of course, I took him home that night. I mean, that body, those eyes, that mouth. It would've been stupid of me not to take that one for a ride. We had the kind of sex that blows your mind. The kind of sex that drains you out, no emotions left to feel, no pain left to complain about, no dreams to have. I was exhausted. I could barely speak.

The next morning he woke up, took a moment, looked into my eyes and kissed me. I woke up, took one look at him and I was ready to go. He had his way with me... again... and again...and.... again. This was the thing I've been longing for, this was exactly what I needed. I felt everything I felt with everybody else at once. I knew there was no turning back. Dumb blond loving idiot was out of the picture.

Then, I said, excuse me... what's your name?