Trapped

I’m trapped between what I want
And what I should want
I cannot love what I love
Because she says it’s not enough
I cannot say what I want to say
Because she says it’s not my voice
I cannot be what I want to be
Because she’s killing that part of me

I just want to dance
I just want to feel alive
I just want to walk
Without the fear of falling down
I just want to be free
Without feeling fear
I want the fear to go away
But she keeps repeating I’m not ok
I want to be brave
But she keeps saying I cannot be
I want to get up
But she keeps kicking me
When I’m trying to do so

I’m trapped between
What I love and hate
I’m a scared little girl
With no one’s hand to hold.
I’m a scared little girl
With almost no hope left
I’m a scared little girl
With a paralyzing fear
I’m a scared little girl
With only one desire left